January 17, 2012

Mark Twain’s 9 Tips For Living A Great Life

“It’s no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.”

“Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.”

“When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it’s a sure sign you’re getting old.”

 

1. Approve Of Yourself.

“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.”

If you don’t approve of yourself, of your behaviour and actions then you’ll probably walk around most of the day with a sort of uncomfortable feeling. If you, on the other hand, approve of yourself then you tend to become relaxed and gain inner freedom to do more of what you really want.

This can, in a related way, be a big obstacle in personal growth. You may have all the right tools to grow in some way but you feel an inner resistance. You can’t get there.

What you may be bumping into there are success barriers. You are putting up barriers in your own mind of what you may or may not deserve. Or barriers that tell you what you are capable of. They might tell you that you aren’t really that kind of person that could this thing that you’re attempting.

Or if you make some headway in the direction you want to go you may start to sabotage for yourself. To keep yourself in a place that is familiar for you.

So you need give yourself approval and allow yourself to be who you want to be. Not look for the approval from others. But from yourself. To dissolve that inner barrier or let go of that self-sabotaging tendency. This is no easy task and it can take time.

 

2. Your Limitations May Just Be In Your Mind.

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

So many limitations are mostly in our minds. We may for instance think that people will disapprove because we are too tall, too old or balding. But these things mostly matter when you think they matter. Because you become self-conscious and worried about what people may think.

And people pick up on that and may react in negative ways. Or you may interpret anything they do as a negative reaction because you are so fearful of a bad reaction and so focused inward on yourself.

If you, on the other hand, don’t mind then people tend to not mind that much either. And if you don’t mind then you won’t let that part of yourself become a self-imposed roadblock in your life.

It is, for instance, seldom too late to do what you want to do.

 

3. Lighten Up And Have Some Fun.

“Humor is mankind’s greatest blessing.”

“Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.”

Humor and laughter are amazing tools. They can turn any serious situation into something to laugh about. They can lighten the mood just about anywhere.

And a lighter mood is often a better space to work in because now your body and mind isn’t filled to the brim with negative emotions. When you are more light-hearted and relaxed then the solution to a situation is often easier to both come up with and implement.

 

4. Let Go Of Anger.

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”

Anger is most of the time pretty pointless. It can cause situations to get out of hand. And from a selfish perspective it often more hurtful for the one being angry then the person s/he’s angry at.

So even if you feel angry at someone for days recognize that you are mostly just hurting yourself. The other person may not even be aware that you are angry at him or her. So either talking to the person and resolving the conflict or letting go of anger as quickly as possible are pretty good tips to make your life more pleasurable.

 

5. Release Yourself From Entitlement.

“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”

When you are young your mom and dad may give a lot of things. As you grow older you may have a sort of entitlement. You may feel like the world should just give you what you want or that it owes you something.

This belief can cause a lot of anger and frustration in your life. Because the world may not give you what expect it to. On the other hand, this can be liberating too. You realize that it is up to you to shape your own life and for you to work towards what you want. You are not a kid anymore, waiting for your parents or the world to give you something.

You are in the driver’s seat now. And you can go pretty much wherever you want.

 

6. If You’re Taking A Different Path, Prepare For Reactions.

“A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.”

I think this has quite a bit of relevance to self-improvement.

If you start to change or do something different than you usually do then people may react in different ways. Some may be happy for you. Some may be indifferent. Some may be puzzled or react in negative and discouraging ways.

Much of these reactions are probably not so much about you but about the person who said it and his/her life. How they feel about themselves is coming through in the words they use and judgements they make.

And that’s OK. I think it’s pretty likely that they won’t react as negatively as you may imagine. Or they will probably at least go back to focusing on their own challenges pretty soon.

So what other people may say and think and letting that hold you back is probably just fantasy and barrier you build in your mind.

You may find that when you finally cross that inner threshold you created then people around you may not shun you or go chasing after you with pitchforks. They might just go: “OK”.

 

7. Keep Your Focus Steadily On What You Want.

“Drag your thoughts away from your troubles… by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.”

What you focus your mind on greatly determines how things play out. You can focus on your problems and dwell in suffering and a victim mentality. Or you can focus on the positive in situation, what you can learn from that situation or just focus your mind on something entirely else.

It may be “normal” to dwell on problems and swim around in a sea of negativity. But that is a choice. And a thought habit. You may reflexively start to dwell on problems instead of refocusing your mind on something more useful. But you can also start to build a habit of learning to gain more and more control of where you put your focus.

 

8. Don’t Focus So Much On Making Yourself Feel Good.

“The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.”

This may be a bit of a counter-intuitive tip. One of the best ways to feel good about yourself is to make someone else feel good or to help them in some way.

This is a great way to look at things to create an upward spiral of positivity and exchange of value between people. You help someone and both of you feel good. The person you helped feels inclined to give you a hand later on since people tend to want to reciprocate. And so the both of you are feeling good and helping each other.

Those positive feelings are contagious to other people and so you may end up making them feel good too. And the help you received from your friend may inspire you to go and help another friend. And so the upward spiral grows and continues.

 

9. Do What You Want To Do.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did so. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Awesome quote. And I really don’t have much to add to that one. Well, maybe to write it down and keep it as a daily reminder – on your fridge or bathroom door – of what you can actually do with your life.

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January 15, 2012

The Importance Of Clear Thinking

“Thinking is the hardest discipline of all.” ~ Thomas Edison

Thoughts have power, are under your control, and can be used wisely or unwisely. Accurate thinkers accept no type of thought, until it is carefully analyzed. Clear thinkers are the masters of their emotions.

Accurate thought involves two basic fundamentals. First you must separate facts from information. Second you must separate facts into two classes (The important and unimportant.) Accurate thinkers allow no one to do their thinking for them.

We have all heard about Mind Over Matter. Mind Power is essential to everything we do. Your ability to cut through the clutter to make great decisions is based on it.

By now, I am sure that everyone reading this has heard about the Law of Attraction. Mind Power is the creative energy, that makes it all happen. The more you can focus your mind and concentrate your attention on whatever it is that you want to create, the easier it is to achieve the results you desire.

Focus and Concentration

Perhaps the two most important qualities of success are focus and concentration. Focus means knowing exactly what it is you want and concentration means having the discipline to concentrate single-mindedly on one thing, the most important thing, until it is complete.

If you have these qualities, and both of these qualities are learned through practice, you can accomplish virtually anything. There are no limits on your future if you can focus and concentrate every hour of every single day.

The best test of your mind power is your ability to concentrate and focus on something for a specific period of time. The longer you can hold your focus on something without being distracted the better.

Develop Decision Making Power

Our decisions shape our lives. Whether we rise to great success or head down to failure, it comes from the decisions we make (and the actions we take). We all make some decisions all day long, consciously and unconsciously… about important and not so important things. The fact is the decisions we make always give us some results and consequences.
Clear and accurate thinkers are the masters of their emotions.

According to Brian Tracy, there are nine disciplines you can develop that will improve every area of your life. We have learned that every exercise of self-discipline strengthens every other discipline at the same time, just as every weakness in self-discipline weakens you in other disciplines as well.

It has been said that there are three types of people. There are those who think (The small minority); there are those that think they think, then there are those who would rather die than think.

  • Take time to think though the critical issues and problems in your life. Put aside long, unbroken chunks of time, thirty, sixty and then ninety minutes. Peter Drucker said that, “Fast people decisions are usually wrong people decisions.” In addition, fast decisions with regard to your family, career, money or any other major issue are usually wrong decisions.
  • Sit quietly for 30-60 minutes to think. Practice solitude on a regular basis. “Go into the silence.”
  • Whenever you practice solitude for more than thirty minutes, you activate your super conscious mind and trigger your intuition. You get it right from the “still, small, silent voice within.”
  • To think better, take a pad of paper and write down every detail of the problem situation you are facing. Sometimes, the right thing to do immerges as you write down the details.
  • Aristotle once said that wisdom (The ability to make good decisions) is a combination of experience plus reflection. The more time that you take to think about your experiences, the more vital lessons you will gain from them.
  • Go for a walk or exercise for 30-60 minutes. Very often when you are exercising, you will get insights or ideas that help you to think better and make better decisions.
  • Talk your situation over with someone else who you like and trust, and who is not emotionally involved. Very often, a different perspective can totally change your viewpoint.
  • Always ask, “What are my assumptions?” What is it that you are assuming to be true about the situation?
  • What if your assumptions were wrong? What if you were preceded on the basis of false information? Always be open to the possibility that you could be completely wrong in your current course of action. Be open to doing something completely different.

Please don’t forget to share this post with your Twitter and Facebook friends and followers!

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January 14, 2012

Your Intuition Can Lead You To Success

If you learn to trust your gut, you will go far. Everyone is born with base instinct. It’s what allows man to survive initially. As you go about life, you might be tempted to over think things, which may drive you into the wrong direction. When you learn to follow your intuition, you may well find that you’re heading straight for success.

Think About Your Gut Feelings

In order to understand intuition, it may help to recall a situation where you had a gut feeling. Maybe you’ve met someone at work who seemed nice enough but they turned out to be a troublemaker. Later you told yourself that as soon as you met them, you just felt like something was up.

For me there were plenty of times growing up where I’d be tested in different classes at school. My gut feeling would tell me to answer one way, but then I would over think and then answer a different way. Often times when the tests were returned, I would realize that my gut feeling was right! I should have gone with the initial answer.

There’s an important lesson to be learned here about intuition. It’s that as you get older, you become more likely to over analyze your feelings. Sometimes an in depth analysis is needed, but sometimes it can be standing in the way of you and success. From now on make an effort to trust your first instinct, and see where life leads you.

Taking Action

When you trust your intuition, it’s a good thing. It’s not just because you’re most likely making the correct decision either. It’s also because you’re going with that first feeling and you’re taking action. Finding success is very much about taking action. Think about all the time you spend thinking about the things you’ve done, or what you plan on doing.

Many people spend their lives talking about or only dreaming of their true goals. It’s those individuals that do something about it that actually reach them. So when your instinct tells you to turn in a certain direction, perhaps you should see where the road leads.

Even if you feel like you’ve made a mistake by taking that road, chances are that you’ve learned a good lesson in the process. This failed attempt shouldn’t be treated as failure either. This is because it may be a necessary step for you to take in order to find your way to success. In that sense, your intuition was likely right all along.

How Your Intuition Helps Others

When you go with your gut feeling, you can also be helping others in the process. It’s also a skill that you can work on in order to develop your intuition. When you become good at this skill, you’ll make a more effective leader, which can be another stepping stone on your way to success.

When you approach any social situation in life, think about your initial grasp of that situation. If you can understand how someone is feeling just by the way that they’re looking at you, you can more than likely help them quickly and efficiently.

When you trust your gut in social situations, you’ll become a more likeable and effective communicator. This is because people will know that you understand them and you’ll be able to roll with the punches when plans change and you discover that you need to be a little more flexible.

Remember that your gut feeling will not always be right, but more often than not it will be right. You need to know and trust yourself and you’ll find success.

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January 7, 2012

7 Wonderful Lessons From Tony Robbins

1. Focus

“One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular.”

Nothing is more critical than focus. If you fail to reach your goal, it is because somewhere along the way your focus was “broken.” Focus is power; a focused person can accomplish more than 100 individuals who are merely interested.

2. Realize That Decisions Decide Destinies

“It’s not what’s happening to you now or what has happened in your past that determines who you become. Rather, it’s your decisions about what to focus on, what things mean to you, and what you’re going to do about them that will determine your ultimate destiny.”

More than anything else, your decisions decide your future. Its how you play the cards that you’ve been dealt that matters most. Decisions decide destinies! The decision to further pursue your education, the decision on who you marry, the decision to start your own business, the decision to just sit around and make excuses; your life is a result of the decisions that you’ve made.

3. Recognize The Path To Success

“The truth of the matter is that there’s nothing you can’t accomplish if: (1) You clearly decide what it is that you’re absolutely committed to achieving, (2) You’re willing to take massive action, (3) You notice what’s working or not, and (4) You continue to change your approach until you achieve what you want, using whatever life gives you along the way.”

Wow, what a quote! This is the path to success.

Anybody can make excuses and say “you have to be lucky to succeed,” but the truth is, we all have the power to succeed, however we’re all not willing to do what it takes to succeed (that’s the difference). Most prefer to sit on the side-line, or play Monday morning quarterback.

4. Raise Your Standard

“Any time you sincerely want to make a change, the first thing you must do is to raise your standards. When people ask me what really changed my life eight years ago, I tell them that absolutely the most important thing was changing what I demanded of myself. I wrote down all the things I would no longer accept in my life, all the things I would no longer tolerate, and all the things that I aspired to becoming. If you don’t set a baseline standard for what you’ll accept in life, you’ll find it’s easy to slip into behaviors and attitudes or a quality of life that’s far below what you deserve.”

In life you get what you accept and what you expect. What do you expect from yourself? Do you expect to be average; do you expect to live an average life or to have an average job? What are you accepting? Are you accepting living paycheck to paycheck? Are you accepting barely getting along?

To succeed you must raise your standard, you must begin to see yourself differently.

5. Major In Major Things

“Most people fail in life because they major in minor things.”

Give your time and attention to what matters most. Dedicate your life to doing big things; leave the little things to someone else. Learn to think big, to act big, and your life will take on a new direction.

Major in major things!

6. Do What You Know To Do

“You see, in life, lots of people know what to do, but few people actually do what they know. Knowing is not enough! You must take action.”

Chances are you already have enough information to dramatically transform your life from the inside-out; you’re just not putting that information into action. It’s not enough to possess knowledge, you must act on what you know in-order to change your destiny.

7. Learn To Follow The Leader

“If you want to be successful, find someone who has achieved the results you want and copy what they do and you’ll achieve the same results.”

There’s no sense in re-creating the wheel. Find someone who’s succeeding and do what they did. If it worked for them, it will work for you. Follow the leader, think like the leader, act like the leader, and you will become the leader!

Thank you for reading and be sure to pass this article along!

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January 2, 2012

10 Things Successful People Lived By Before They Made It

1. They Didn’t Use Excuses.

We all have two voices. There’s the voice that tells us to work hard, to focus on the task at hand and to finish it before we move on to the next. And to finish it well.

We also have the voice that tells us to take a break, to think about what’s on TV, or to visit a site that we like to visit that entertains us – whether it’s ESPN.com or facebook.

In life we’re the victim of injustice from time to time. It could be a promotion that we deserve but don’t get. No matter who we are, we’re going to be treated unfairly at some point. We can either feel sorry for ourselves, or push forward and put it behind us – even use it as motivation.

Nelson Mandela could have used his unjust imprisonment as an excuse to give into his anger. Instead, he used it as an opportunity to learn, grow, and eventually free others.

Listen to your excuses. Understand why you have them. Then figure out how you can use them for good.

2. It Wasn’t Just About Them.

‘Things’ can be a motivator, they can even be a reward, but they can’t be the motivator. The truly successful in life always get there because they created change in the lives of others, not just their own.

If something drives you that is greater than just the ‘ends’, we’re going to work harder, longer, and we’re going to give more of ourselves to our project.

Yes we can make money when we have the primary goal of making money. Some might even use that money for good – which is awesome. But there’s no fulfillment in simply making money. And isn’t that the point?

3. Early Mornings And Late Nights.

People who have achieved true success in their lives have worked for it.

This might come at the detriment of other areas of their lives, such as family or social life. But their mission is first and foremost. Until it’s complete, everything else comes second.

There’s literally no substitute for hard work. Abraham Lincoln said, “Things may come to those who wait… but only the things left by those who hustle.” If you want to be successful, you’re going to have to out hustle everyone else.

4. The Greatest Commodity.

Energy is a huge commodity that is often not talked about. Yes, energy in the sense of fuel and electricity is talked about everywhere, but I’m talking about our own energy levels.

The fact is that the more energy we have, the easier it is to focus, and the higher the quality of our work is.

One of Richard Branson‘s ‘key’s to success’ is staying in great physical shape. So would raised energy levels be the greatest benefit to working out? It may be.

Keeping physically fit gives us greater blood-flow to our brain, enhanced alertness and improved focus. Make training a routine part of your life and increase your chances at success – in every meaning of the word.

5. Principles.

History will be kind to me. For I intend to write it.

Winston Churchill had principles. The difference between him and the rest of us, is that he stuck to his principles at all costs. He didn’t waver when they weren’t popular – an extreme rarity in politics.

What are your principles? All of us should have them, know what they are, and live our lives by them.

One of Apple’s principles is to bring change to the world through technology, and they do it with every product they release.

Identify what principles you have that guide your life through tough times, and when things couldn’t be any better. They shouldn’t change, and at your core, neither should you.

6. Wavering, Yet Unbreakable Faith.

We all have moments of doubt. Even the best of us question if our dream is going to come true. The one thing that separates the truly successful from those who never reach their true potential is an unbreakable faith in the fact that what they’re doing is right.

Even if they have moments of doubt, they’re soon quelled, where other’s listen to that doubt and let it eat them up and finally they quit.

Have your moments of doubt. You’re human. Just don’t let that doubt eat you up. Instead let it motivate you to prove your optimism right.

7. A Reason.

Many of the greatest accomplishments in the world were accomplished by insecure men and women, people who had something to prove to others. A desire to elevate their status and create change that was so strong, that failure is simply never and option.

Abraham Lincoln‘s reason(s) had to do a lot with his view of himself in relation to how other’s viewed him. Where others saw a poor, illiterate boy, Lincoln saw someone capable of achieving more, even if he had to do it completely on his own. He also saw the need for change. A nation that preached freedom wasn’t free. He saw something fundamentally wrong with this and set out to change it. His why wasn’t about him. Which in turn made him one of history’s great men.

Understand why. You have that reason to work when others sleep, to sacrifice a safe life for a risky one with no ceiling. Find it by asking why, and not stopping until you hit your core, emotional reason for wanting to change your status, or the status of others.

8. They Persevered When Others Didn’t.

How does the guy who quit on his dream know how long it would’ve taken him to become a success? He doesn’t. None of us do. It could be tomorrow, or ten years from now.

What separates a lot of the great people we read about in our history books from those we’ve never heard of is the fact that they never quit. Quitting was never an option. They only stopped when they reached their dream. And even then, they created a new mission.

Take James J. Braddock, or even Nelson Mandela, for example. They didn’t achieve their greatness or success early on in their careers or in life like some. They achieved it after surviving. They survived while others literally died, or quit. In their cases it wasn’t just that they were the best, but they were the best because of what they endured. They were the last one’s standing.

We don’t know when our breakthrough will come. So don’t guarantee your failure by quitting. You can adapt, change, and evolve, but never, never, never quit.

9. Great People Relentlessly Studied Their Craft.

Tony Gwynn and Mike Tyson studied their craft as much as anyone. Gwynn spent hours upon hours studying opposing pitchers. He studied their patterns. He wasn’t the most athletic guy around, but he put his work in to be the best at what he did: hit baseballs.

When people think of Tyson, they think of an animal, but what we fail to see is the student. No one studied boxing like Tyson did. Watched more film than anyone in the history of the sport. He was a student first, a fighter second.

These great athletes studied film, but how can we perfect our craft?

Using myself as an example; much of my job has to do with writing, and obviously fitness. So, I study those two things. I read books about how to become a better writer, ways to connect with the reader, and I simply read great books written by authors who are much better at writing than I am. If you’re in sales, read and study sales. If you’re a marketer, then do the same with marketing.

Being a drone that simply goes through the motions is no way to achieve greatness. Assuming success is something you want, you have to study your craft, whatever it may be. Learn it inside and out. Build a wealth of knowledge. It’ll help you create great, inspiring, and unique work.

10. Risk.

No risk, no reward. Yes it’s an over-used, cliché of a phrase. But it’s true. Those who have achieved real success have often risked the most to get there.

There have been billions of people throughout history who have had the ability to achieve greatness, whether it was the talent or smarts, they had it. What they didn’t have was the guts to risk the life that they were living. They also didn’t have the work ethic to see their talent realized.

The greatest tragedy in life is wasted talent ~ A Bronx Tale

Your big, audacious dream might be to marry the girl of your dreams and have a family with her. You risk might be to leave the career that you love in order to support her and your family. Your dream might be to help millions live longer, healthier lives. Whatever your dream is, give it enough of a chance to be realized.

Risk if you truly want to see the reward.
Find your dream. Then risk everything to get it.

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January 1, 2012

Top 10 Ways to Ensure New Years’ Resolution Is A Success

Did you know that fewer than 10% of people who set New Years’ Resolutions actually achieve them? How can you ensure YOUR success? Try using the Top 10 Tips below.

1. Write Them Down.

It’s a fact: writing down your goals gives you a higher chance of success.

2. Commit.

Move beyond the land of “good ideas” to the land of true “commitment”. Make the decision that you will show up for your goals. Perhaps you can do a ritual or ceremony to symbolize your commitment?

3. Go Public.

Let your biggest fans in on your new commitments and goals for the year.

4. Get Accountability.

Even better than just letting others in on your “secret” dreams and goals-get some accountability. Meet for lunch once a month with a group that will ask you, “So, how’s it going with your goal?” Hire a Coach. Talk to your best friend or partner. Get some support!

5. Make a Plan.

Ensure success with a step-by-step plan. Start with the end vision of where you want to be and backtrack to where you are today. You’ll find an easy action plan to make your goals a reality.

6. Do An Intuition Check-In.

Before you decide on what you’ll take on for the year, make certain you can answer, “YES!” to the following questions: “Am I the primary reason for setting this goal (vs. your mom, boyfriend, wife, boss, society, inner critic)? Do I feel alive and energized by this goal? Is this goal in line with my life purpose or mission?”

7. Get Real!

If you’re contemplating putting a goal down that you always put down and never achieve, take a second look. Sit with the goal and honesty assess: How will this goal end DIFFERENTLY this year? Is this goal something you need to let go of? How is failing at this goal serving you (do you feel justified, victimized, or like a martyr come year end)? Is this goal masking as a form of self-punishment? What is the good enough reason to truly commit?

8. Focus With Reminders.

Once you’ve written down your goals, created a plan and made sure they are worthy to pursue, figure out ways to remind yourself. Post your goals in the bathroom mirror or in the car. Others put reminders in their blackberries, iPhones or cell phones. Figure out what works for you.

9. Believe and Visualize.

Do you know the story about the group of basketball players who spent one hour visualizing making baskets, while another group actually practiced? The visualizing players had better seasons! So visualize yourself on New Year’s Eve NEXT year with all your goals achieved. What would that look like? How would it feel? Visualize once a day and see the difference it can make in your life. We recommend a daily pause practice- space to simply BE and visualize.

10. Use anchors.

Tie your goal to a habit you already have in place. Perhaps you decide to do your exercise right after brushing your teeth, or practice meditation/daily pause before checking email. Anchoring your new behavior and goals to an existing habit is a great tool for success.

May this year be the year that your goals and dreams manifest with ease and joy!

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December 29, 2011

Do I Always Need To Be Right?

Our world is full of variety. On any given day we can have both positive and negative experiences. Many of these experiences ultimately influence the way we see the world and the opinions we form about how the world works.

Everyone lives in the context of their own perspective. While one person may look at a snow storm and be excited about the possibilities to get out and have fun, another person might be full of fear because they had previously been involved in a driving accident caused by dangerous winter driving conditions.

The events and circumstances are neutral. Our opinions about them are not!

Since we all have our own way of seeing the world, conflict with family, friends, colleagues, etc… is inevitable. There is absolutely no way that you are going to process every event in the same way as the people in your life. When these conflicts and differences of opinion arise, are you prepared to deal with them?

While I do believe that a good debate can often lead to effective solutions of problems, many debates can turn sour and become more toxic than helpful. When this happens, it is important to recognize that the situation will likely end in a stale mate and that you don’t “need” to be right.

The “need to be right” can be harmful to your health. If you spend all of your focus and energy trying desperately to convince someone else that your perspective is the correct one, you are creating a huge amount of unneeded stress in your life. If you go into this mode of “needing to be right”, you should take a step back and ask yourself why. Why do I need to be right? Why do I need this other person to accept my way of thinking so badly?

This ultimately comes down to self esteem. If you believe in your heart that a certain perspective is 100% true, there is absolutely no need to force anyone else to agree with you. The sooner you can embrace this, the sooner you will reduce stress and create more happiness in your life.

Embrace the idea of not “needing to be right”. If someone is taking an aggressive stance with you and trying to force an opinion on you that you do not agree with, let it go! Let them be right in their head and you can confidently carry your own truth in your heart.

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December 26, 2011

Finding The Courage Within

The defining moments in life are those that present us with a consequential choice to make.

Sometimes there is an easy way out, but others times, we have to make a decision despite our uncertainty and fear.

We have to be courageous and confront our doubts.

What Is Courage?

Courage is an emotional state defined as overcoming a threat that may be accompanied by fear, sadness, or anger.

In the general sense, courage is often glorified. We might think of having to physically risk our life to save another, or leading an effort of social change to make the world a better place.

Not everyone will be as courageous as Martin Luther King Jr. or Gandhi, but that doesn’t mean we should approach life as a passive victim to our fears and insecurities.

These notions of general courage are incredibly inspiring, but at the same time can give the impression that courage is a romanticized quality.

In a basic sense, courageous people simply finish what they start, are authentic in their values and behavior, and are willing to take on a challenge or threat.

I’m sure there has been a time when you undertook a challenge or overcame an obstacle even though you didn’t feel completely comfortable and confident.

Finding Personal Courage

The truth is we all have to enlist personal courage if we are to grow and persevere in life.

Courage isn’t the same for everyone. One person may need courage to reach out and make new friends. We may need to summon courage to ask our boss for a raise, or to have an important conversation with our spouse.

Courage doesn’t have to mean overcoming incredibly steep odds and stimulating a social revolution. Courage is what you find within as you tackle the ups and downs of daily life.

Stepping outside of our comfort zone isn’t easy. We have to muster up courage to take a risk and move past our personal limits. But, as you begin to do this, you will start to see the courage that resides within.

Be A Warrior And Lead For Change

If you haven’t felt courageous lately, think about all the times you pushed past limits and persevered in the past. We have all had to overcome difficulties.

Life requires we take a warrior mentality at times. When down and out, a warrior doesn’t give in and surrender. They keep fighting the good fight until they overcome the enemy.

Often times, the enemy is our own self-imposed limits.

Every day there are opportunities to expand our potential and grow in our faith, confidence, and resilience if we remember that life requires a warrior mentality.

Start spending time with people whom you admire and who embody courage and honor. You will start to see that courage is a daily part of life.

Little by little, step outside your comfort zone and you will begin to feel more confident and courageous.

You may even start to feel a passion and burning desire to make a change.

Who knows, maybe you will be next in line to lead a revolutionary change in the world and inspire others.

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December 25, 2011

Do You Have a Growth Mindset?

I was speaking with a close friend recently who was having difficulty accepting where she was in her career. She didn’t feel things were coming together as quickly as she would’ve liked and started to second guess if she was following the right path.

This was all based on the idea that progress was coming too slowly and not as naturally as she expected.

She started to discount her ability and even view her apparent skills and talents to be nonexistent. Even when receiving complements, she would be unable to accept them internally.

This is a clear example of having a “fixed mindset,” or the belief that personal talents, skills, and characteristics are unchangeable.

When you run into problems do you assume it’s because you don’t have the skill and competence needed?

Or, do you have a “growth mindset,” where you recognize that personal attributes are often changeable, manageable, and can be learned?

Life is a journey of learning, and when we are able to recognize this, resilience and tenacity will become a part of our natural response.

Focusing on growth can be applied to many domains of life. It can be related to education, career, or relationships, and below are just a few ideas to build this capacity.

Embrace Uncertainty

If there is one thing that is for sure, it’s that life and our future is uncertain. Uncertainty is nothing to be feared, but is a constant part of life that offers us a chance to explore our potential.

Think big and bold when it comes to uncertainty. Take action and don’t be afraid to deal with unexpected circumstances. We can learn from mistakes and correct things as we go.

Seek New Experiences

With a growth mindset we are open to new experiences. It is accepted that we aren’t going to always do well the first time around, and that new experiences are harmless in the bigger picture.

Experiencing something new is a major way we can expand our perception of what is possible and recognize the vast possibilities we may disregard without personal experience.

Broaden Skills And Opportunities

As we become more focused on growth we can begin to broaden our skills. We can cease to be scared about trying new things and can develop greater competence because of this.

We will also begin to notice new opportunities that we didn’t recognize prior to our new skills. There is no one I know who didn’t have to learn what they know today. Skills can be improved and learned, so don’t discount yourself before you try to learn.

Learning is a part of life. There is nothing unnatural or inferior about taking time to progress and learn how to do something. We may see people with natural talent, but these skills and abilities were cultivated and developed over time.

Failure should never mean we aren’t supposed to do something. Much of what we aspire for in life will be a growth endeavor, so be prepared to work hard and dedicate time to practice and preparation.

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December 24, 2011

25 Super Inspirational Quotes About Life

1. Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself – George Bernard Shaw.

2. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover – Mark Twain.

3. Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds you plant – Robert Louis Stevenson.

4. We don’t see things the way they are. We see them the way WE are – Talmud.

5. I have found that if you love life, life will love you back – Arthur Rubinstein.

6. The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be – Marcel Pagnol.

7. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step – Lao Tzu.

8. Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go do it. Because what the world needs is more people who have come alive – Howard Thurman.

9. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make, the better – Ralph Waldo Emerson.

10. Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like – Will Rogers.

11. I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it has been – Wayne Gretzky.

12. Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional – Anon-mouse.

13. Every man dies. Not every man really lives – William Ross Wallace.

14. Life isn’t a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, latte in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming ‘Woohoo WHAT A RIDE’!

15. There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle – Albert Einstein.

16. Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security – John Allen Paulos.

17. You are not in this world to live up to other people’s expectations, nor should you feel the world must live up to yours – F Perl.

18. How you do one thing, is how you do everything. Be aware.

19. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing – Helen Keller.

20. Life is not about kissing a**, it’s about kicking a**!

21. The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it – Henry David Thoreau.

22. Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself – Harvey Fierstein.

23. Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are – John Wooden.

24. In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away – Shing Xiong.

25. Love like you’ve never been unfriended. Sing like nobody’s following. Share like you care. And do it all like it won’t end up on youtube!

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